Because Imitation Is The Most Desperate Form Of Flattery

July 3, 2009

Every single day this week has been essentially the same: tumble out of bed, stumble to the kitchen, pour myself a cup of ambition and yawn and stretch and try to come to life. Or at least that would have been the case if my name happened to be Doralee and I was struggling with how to handle my manipulative, chauvinistic boss.

Nonetheless, the week has definitely been a little on the repetitive side, as evidenced by the fact that yesterday I ended my post with “Happy Wednesday” WHEN IT WAS IN FACT THURSDAY, OH SOMEBODY PLEASE HELP ME I’VE LOST ALL TRACK OF TIME. And while this week really has been an absolutely delightful time for our little family and we’ve enjoyed all manner of summer fun (the second week of Wimbledon always makes for some happy hearts around here), I’m pretty much worn slap out as I sit here and stare Friday in the face.

At least I think it’s Friday.

Of course, my weariness may have something to do with the fact that I haven’t fallen asleep before 2 any night this week. I’ve tried to sleep, but at some point I’ve given up and gotten out of bed and turned on the computer and watched old Michael Jackson videos on YouTube.

(Now that I think about it, aside from the fact that I now watch YouTube instead of MTV, my late nights have basically been like the summer of ‘88 all over again.)

(Except that I no longer have bangs that have been teased into the shape of a large carnation, and I’m no longer hoping beyond all hope that Bruce Willis and Cybill Shepherd will realize that they’re deeply in love and want to spend the rest of their lives together.)

(I may have mentioned before that as a teenager I was mildly obsessed with “Moonlighting.” I continue to stand by that choice.)

Anyway, Big Mama and I were emailing back and forth last night, THE NIGHT THAT WAS THURSDAY, and I mentioned to her that we should have recorded a podcast since I’m struggling with quite the case of bloggy block and I don’t have anything to write about and besides that, all the words in all the languages are conspiring against me so that I can’t make sentences. And because Melanie is a selfless friend, she said, Hey, you know you could always post a 4th of July playlist like I’m doing tomorrow.

And I was all, OKAY.

And she was all, PERFECT.

And I was all, DO THE SONGS HAVE TO BE PATRIOTIC? BECAUSE I DON’T KNOW THAT MANY PATRIOTIC SONGS.

And she was all, WHATEVS.

Except that Melanie has never in her whole life said “Whatevs.” I mean, Mel and I like to stay up to date on the pop culture and all, but we try to respect age-appropriate slang-usage limits. And “whatevs” is way beyond our limits. In fact, for women in second half of their 30s, “whatevs” is currently out in the middle of the Atlantic. WHERE WE CAN’T REACH IT.

By the way, it makes me laugh that I asked Melanie so many questions about posting the playlist. AS IF SHE HAD MADE UP SOME RULES.

So. My list. At this point, you must be absolutely beside yourself with ambivalence.

Nonetheless, here are some songs – old and new – that just scream summer to me, even if they have nothing at all to do with summer, but I’m sure at some point I’ve listened to them in the summertime, so hey, THEY TOTALLY QUALIFY.

1) “Hard To Handle” – Black Crowes – This song stops me in my tracks every single time I hear it. It reminds me of being in college and hanging out with my friend Daphne and riding around Starkville, Mississippi with absolutely no destination in mind. Perfection.

2) “Sweet Southern Comfort” – Buddy Jewell – This song will forever make me think of the summer after Alex was born, a glorious time when I was still hormonal enough to bawl my eyes out when Buddy Jewell sang “Sleepy sweet home Alabama / Roll Tide, Roll.” And I’m not even a Crimson Tide fan. But Tuscaloosa’s just about 45 minutes down the road, and that was enough.

3) “A Lot Like Me” – Dave Barnes – Don’t even listen to it if you’re not willing to sing along. And loudly.

4) “Waterfalls” – TLC – “Don’t go chasin’ waterfalls. Please stick to the rivers and the lakes that you’re used to.” Summer of 1998, anyone?

5) “The Wanderer” – Marc Broussard – A glorious summer love song. And sort of mysterious. And oh-so-delicious.

6) “Life Light Up” – Christy Nockels – Apparently my plans for summer ‘09 include listening to this song at least three times a day. The chorus makes me want to stand up and jump. But since I normally listen to this song while I’m driving, I resist the urge. You’re welcome.

7) “Your Smiling Face” – James Taylor – Pure sunshine in musical form.

8) “Till You’re Gone” – Gabe Dixon Band – David’s best friend Todd and I have nearly identical taste in music, and when I heard the version of this song that’s on GDB’s “Disappear” EP, I sent Todd an email that basically looked like this: “OH MY WORD AT THE BANGY PIANO AND CLAPPING YOU MUST DOWNLOAD IMMEDIATELY.” And he did. This is but one reason why I love him.

9) “Brandy” – Looking Glass – It’s solid 70s gold, y’all.

10) “Summer Breeze” – Jason Mraz – I’m a sucker for a good cover of classic song, and this totally fits the bill. Plus, I adore Jason Mraz’s kicky quirkiness.

11) “Wild At Heart” – Gloriana – Makes me want to jump on a boat and speed across the water but stop the boat in the middle of the lake when it gets to the part of the song where all the music drops out so that I can lead a small group of people in a unified over-the-head clap-along. Which is all COMPLETELY realistic.

12) “The Star Spangled Banner” – Jennifer Hudson – The older I get, the harder it is for me to sing and / or listen to the National Anthem without my bottom lip getting all quivery. And I think Jennifer Hudson’s version is absolutely gorgeous.

I know. It’s sort of an eclectic list, isn’t it? Feel free to chime in with your own suggestions for the world’s summertime song canon.

Happy 4th, everybody!


Linky Interwebby Awesomeness 07.02.09

July 2, 2009

In anticipation of the 4th of July, here’s an extra special list-o-links, all guaranteed to make your holiday weekend even more holidayier. Which is TOTALLY a word.

1) Five Guys – I love these hamburgers so much that when I asked a college friend if she had a Five Guys in her town and she said no, I looked at her with great sincerity and said, “Oh, I am so sorry.” Best burger and fries I’ve ever eaten.

And people, I am no stranger to the burger or the fries.

2) “Up” – OH MY WORD I LOVED IT. If I were still in graduate school I’d probably really dig into the symbolism and then write a critical essay or nine, but since I haven’t been in graduate school since the 90s, I’ll just sit here on my blog and say really profound things like OH MY WORD I LOVED IT. You’re welcome.

3) “The Next Food Network Star” – Sometimes it’s difficult to find somebody to root for in these types of shows, especially when people get all cutthroat and catty and whathaveyou. But I really, really like the cast of this season’s “Food Network Star,” and I’m really, really rooting for Debbie, Jamika and Melissa.

And FYI: Bob, one of the judges on the show, has a blog called, well, Bob’s Blog.

(Which makes me think of The Bob Loblaw Law Blog.)

(And if you get the Bob Loblaw reference without having to Google it, you need to know right here and now that we are FRIENDS FOR LIFE.)

4) Pioneer Woman’s Sundried Tomato Pasta Salad – I should probably clarify that I haven’t actually made this recipe, mainly because I know that I’m the only person in this house who would eat it. And while I do love a challenge, I don’t really think that I’m up to the task of singlehandedly taking down a pound of corkscrew pasta with a cup and a half of Parmesan cheese on top. So what I’ve done instead is to look at the recipe about three times a day and then think about how delicious it would be. It’s the late-30s version of sitting around and daydreaming about how awesome it would be if Jake Ryan showed up at your house in his Porsche.

5) Two more recipes I cannot wait to try: Missy’s Bread Pudding (the title of her post made me laugh out loud) and Veronica’s Caramel Buttermilk Cake.

And no kidding, when I just typed the words “caramel buttermilk cake,” I heard the words that have closed many an Anglican prayer in my head: thanks be to God.

Happy Wednesday, y’all!


Bacon Always Comes To The Rescue

June 30, 2009

Today was just a typical summer day for us – a little swimming, a little errand running, a little resting, a little playing – and I was honestly wondering how in the sam hill I was going to write a blog post tonight considering the deep level of mundane we’ve got going on over here. I mean, would you like to hear about the new sunscreen I bought today at Target? Or the pile of towels I haven’t folded? Or how I can’t seem to get the water out of my ears and keep asking people to repeat things? Or how I pulled out the Windex this morning because our coffee table glass is all smudgy and here it is sixteen hours later and that coffee table has still not seen fit to grab hold of that Windex and CLEAN ITS OWN DADGUM SELF, CAN YOU EVEN BELIEVE THE NERVE?

But tonight I was flipping between HGTV and Food Network – as I tend to do on all the days that end in “y” – and do you know what show was about to come on Food Network? DO YOU KNOW?

A show called “The Best Thing I Ever Ate – With Bacon.”

(!!!)

It was like I had died and gone to fried pork heaven, y’all.

(And do you know what you do in fried pork heaven? You talk incessantly about bacon. THEN YOU EAT IT.)

I won’t spoil all the delightful bacon-related details in case you haven’t seen the show yet, but I didn’t just watch that show: I talked back to it. I almost shouted “AMEN” one time, but I caught myself and just said “YESSIR” instead. However, I’m pretty sure that if I’d had a handkerchief in my hand I would’ve waved it. And a couple of times the food looked so good that I thought about standing up and stomping my feet in affirmation, but I figured my husband was probably disturbed enough that I was talking back to a TV show about bacon, so I erred on the side of restraint.

Anyway, watching the show made me think about the best thing I’ve ever eaten with bacon, and initially I decided that I’m a purist – someone who likes thick-sliced bacon fried really crispy, the end. But then I remembered the first time I cooked Spicy Barbecued Shrimp – eight or nine years ago, probably – and after I tasted it I thought oh, the bacon TOTALLY transforms the flavor of this dish. To this day it’s one of my favorite recipes, and in light of tonight’s TV show, I thought I’d share it with y’all.

And this is not an original recipe, mind you. It’s from Southern Living, but since I can’t find it on SL’s recipe site anymore, I’ll just type it out here. Because apparently it’s very important to me that we all enjoy the bacon.

Spicy Barbecue Shrimp

1/4 pound bacon, chopped
1 stick (1/2 cup) butter
1 medium onion, chopped
4 garlic cloves, pressed
2 tablespoons Old Bay seasoning
2 teaspoons hot sauce
2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
1 1/2 pounds unpeeled, medium-size fresh shrimp

Saute’ bacon a large skillet until crisp. Add butter and next 4 ingredients, and cook over medium heat until onion is tender. Stir in lemon juice and shrimp; cook, stirring often, 5 to 7 minutes or until shrimp turn pink. Serve with French bread. Makes 3 to 4 main dish servings or 8 appetizer servings.

One amendment to the recipe: after you eat all your shrimp, you really need to sop up the remaining butter and bacon grease and seasoning with your French bread. I just want to encourage you to do that, okay? It’s BACON-INFUSED BUTTER, for crying out loud. There’s just no good reason to be timid. Except for the sake of your cholesterol, of course, but you can worry about that another time.

And by all means, if you have any bacon-related recipes (or lo, even bacon-related memories) that you’d like to share with the class, I think I can speak for all of us and say THE INTERNET WOULD BE SO GRATEFUL.

In fact, if I may paraphrase something that Duff from “Ace of Cakes” said during tonight’s show: it’ll be a “celebacon.”

Why yes. Yes it will be.

And I for one could not be more delighted.


Some Thoughts & Some Things

June 29, 2009

So the reason I asked all the questions about the laundry and the recipes is because I just needed some reassurance about what passes for “normal” in the day-to-day. You know how sometimes you can watch TV or read blogs or whatever and start to feel like you’re the ONLY PERSON IN THE WORLD who doesn’t have everything together? Well, that’s how I felt yesterday as I watched TV while sitting in a chair that was next to an unpacked suitcase. Which was next to an unmade bed. In a room next to a guest room with a shamefully big pile of unfolded laundry in it. And then I watched “The Next Food Network Star” and was completely intimidated by the way all those people can take five random ingredients and create something spectacular.

As for the silverware question, it was because of something I noticed a couple of weeks ago when I was in my hometown. My mama and my aunt both put silverware in their dishwashers with the handles down. And I don’t. I always put the handles up so that that’s what I touch when I put away the silverware. Somehow that’s always made the most sense to me. But when I noticed that Mama and C. clearly do not adhere to the same handle-up philosophy, I realized that I’vw deviated from family dishwashing tradition. And now I’ve spent the better part of two weeks wondering WHERE, OH WHERE DID I GO WRONG?*

(*Overly dramatic for effect. You’re welcome.)

Anyway. Y’all made me (and a whole bunch of other people) feel much better and much more normal today. For that I am mighty grateful indeed.

And in case you were wondering, I haven’t been caught up on laundry since 2005.

*****

No “Bachelorette” post this week for several reasons (in no particular order: crazy schedule ahead, Ed’s gone, feeling sort of bothered in general about the tone this season has taken, Wes is still there, not wanting to have to dance around the, um, issues that are supposedly in store on the fantasy dates, not really enjoying the recap process when I’m not rooting for anyone and, well, feeling pretty convicted that I need to take a “Bachelor”-related break).

I think that pretty much covers it.

*****

One bit of TV-related news I’ve neglected to mention: did any of y’all watch “Glee” when it premiered after the “American Idol” season finale? I LOVED IT SO MUCH. It wasn’t perfect – there was one plotline I didn’t care for, and I thought some of the characters were a bit stereotypical – but on the whole the show was hilarious and entertaining right out of the gate. The fact that I’ve always been a sucker for a good show choir number probably has something to do with why I immediately loved a TV show about, well, a fledgling show choir.

Anyway, I’ve watched this “Glee” clip about four times today, so I figure that it’s only fair to provide you with an opportunity to play catch-up.

OH, THE HAPPY.

Y’all have a great Tuesday!


How Do You Do The Things That You Do?

I spent a substantial portion of yesterday afternoon watching a combination of HGTV and Food Network, and for reasons completely unknown to me, looking at all those different houses and kitchens made me think about the way I do certain things in my house. You know, things like how I slice an onion or how I stack my dishes or how I fold my fitted sheets or how I don’t wash my windows, well, EVER.

Never underestimate the power of home- and/or cooking-related television programming to inspire a serious bout of housekeeping inferiority, my friends. Beats anything I’ve ever seen.

And honestly, I don’t really feel that inferior. But I do think that I may do a few household-related things in a way that’s more complicated than necessary OR that’s just flat-out different from the norm.

So, as part of a deeply informal and completely unscientific surveying process, I have a few random questions for you, the people of the interweb.

1) How many days a week are you completely caught up on laundry?

2) When you load your dishwasher, do you load the silverware basket with handles down or handles up?

3) FINALLY – can you make up recipes off the top of your head? Or do you have to follow a recipe somebody else has written?

Clearly THE FATE OF THE FREE WORLD hinges on your answers.

So, you know, NO PRESSURE.

My crazy and I will be anxiously awaiting your responses.